Dominatrix By Design part 7

I walked away feeling both angry and guilty. I had 100 dollars in my hand and nothing to do but spend it on stupid video games that adults play; stupid games that I didn’t want to play. I think I hated it so much because she loved it so. I walked to the first game I saw and fed the crisp bill into it, all the while hating I was there. I pushed the button like the rest of the lab rats in the smoky dirty place. Then, something happened that changed my life. I broke the machine. I seem to have that effect on many things that I touch or come into contact with. I break stuff; anything at all. I can unsuspectingly break things that aren’t even supposed to break. That really was a curse that I lived with. A long legged klutz that walked into walls sober. I had broken the damn game by simply pushing a tiny little button. Looking back, I love my curse. It is a gift, I see that very clearly now.  This game stopped working and I was going to have to interact with people which I dreaded. I looked up from the machine and I saw my mother staggering towards me with a glass of pinot grigio in her hand; sloshing all the way as she spilled it a little at a time as she sauntered over with her nose in the air. Had she forgotten where she came from? Apparently she had; she had forgotten.

I dreaded seeing her face again so soon, but alas, here she was in all her perceived glory. I told her that my machine‘s screen went black and she uttered something under her breath that reeked of wine and tooth decay. Her breath was a foul as the scowl on her face.  It was poetic justice. It was ironically beautiful. It was incredibly painful. I was alone.

I looked around for anyone to help me. I saw a woman that worked there and explained my predicament. She told me she would get someone to help me and I graciously walked back to my drunk and I waited. I waited in complete silence with her as she downed her glass of wine. I stared at her and wondered who the fuck is this lady and what did she do with the woman I knew as my mother?  My mother was never warm and loving but this bitch that sat beside me repulsed me beyond belief. I wondered how she could be so unhappy and why she would do this to herself. She was completely unaware of her surroundings and I actually felt sorry for her for a second.